Tuesday, November 3, 2015

Ten Signs Jerry Springer is Going Soft

10. ‘Two bit hos’ no longer welcome on his show.
  9. He makes his staff tell the transsexual stripper to keep “her” clothes ON.
  8. He throws a chair at the Klansman during “Klanfrontation” but you can tell he really isn’t into it.
  7. He really cares about the feelings of the “zero who got dumped for a hero”.
  6. Television decency protestors stop complaining about his show and start complaining about             Oprah being “out of control by comparison”.
  5. Ozzy Osbourne stops watching the show. (When he figures out the remote control, that is.)
  4. ABC plans “Jerry Springer goes to Disneyland” special.
  3. “Next on Jerry Springer: ‘My name is Maya Angelou and I want to recite my poetry!’”
  2. Jerry Fallwell promotes new DVD called “Jerry Springer: Too Mild For TV!”
  1. “Next on Jerry Springer: ‘My name is Alan Greenspan and I want to discuss monetary policy!’”